Growing

I've been absent from this space this month. There hasn't been much time for sewing, crafting, photography and um, *ahem* blogging- all the things that feed my soul. I knew that life would change when Matteo started Kindergarten, but I didn't realize to what a great extent it would. These past few months I've been immersing myself in this new world that not just Matteo, but our entire family, had entered. A new school, a new community... it has been hard. It's no small irony that while Matteo waved good-bye to me happily as I dropped him off in his Kindergarten classroom, it was ME who burst into tears at the parent coffee and bagel reception afterward (I owe special thanks to the sweet PTA volunteer who I think was specifically designated at the front door to give hugs to new Kindergarten parents like myself). These past few months have been quite a journey for me as I've moved past my comfort zone to get involved in the big, exciting school that will be the place where my boys will spend most of their days in the years to come.

Helping the kids with the Dia de Los Muertos (Day of The Dead) craft

I've started volunteering in Matteo's classroom and it's made a world of difference in making me feel at peace in our decision to send our children to public school. The first afternoon I walked in to help out, the lights were dimmed, sitar music was playing and Matteo's teacher had a room full of 5 year-old children in yoga warrior poses repeating the affirmation "I am strong, I am smart, I am at peace" :). I've gotten to know all of Matteo's classmates and many their parents and it's been exciting to meet people from so many different cultures and backgrounds. I feel like our world is expanding ever so much.

In the school garden on Pumpkin Patch Day

But most importantly, Matteo LOVES school. He's excited about what he's learning, he loves playing with letters and learning how to create words, he loves seeing numbers and knowing what they represent. My boy is growing and I am so proud.

I realized that I am growing as well. It was really hard for me to let go of my ideal of sending the boys to a Waldorf school. I realized that I can love many of the principles of Waldorf education and do them at home but still be happy with my son at a public school. I've been spending a lot of time at his school, in the classroom, participating in fundraisers, going to school events and I've realized that this big new school doesn't need to be scary. After seeing Matteo embrace his new surroundings with such joy and excitement, I knew I wanted to support and be a part of this amazing environment.

So, many of my own personal pursuits have been put on the back burner as we've been settling into this new time in our lives. I had been beating myself up over not being able to craft or run or do anything remotely creative, but I realize that the time I've been putting into Matteo's school has been about putting time into my own growth as a mother and person. I've been missing this space and the creative part of me that it represents. I'm so very happy that I feel as if I'm in a place that I can finally exhale all the anxieties I've had these past months and return to those things and this wonderful community that give me joy.

dyeing playsilks for Autumn

With so much gratitude for your companionship on this journey of parenthood...

all my love,
Marina